i was gonna write some MUCH longer here but i kept putting it off and now i
probably just won't. it's fine, idk. but the gist of it is that i'm kinda lonely
and i genuinely don't know how much this is affecting me. sometimes i feel fine
about it, or just don't "feel" about it at all. sometimes it's just, like, damn.
kinda sucks, it kinda hurts. like, i can still function usually, it just makes
me feel kinda sad and takes away some joy in things. and like, it's "sad" as in,
like, not depressed, though sometimes it leads to that, but not always. idk like
i said i had much more to write here, including how i even got to this point,
but like, it's complicated