i don't know what i'm feeling and i get overwhelmed everytime i think about it
but i can't not think about it. i don't have any path in life that is appealing
to me. i'm just, stuck, what the fuck do i do, i'm failing classes and even if i
wasn't i just don't really like it here but also there's opportunities here i
can't find anywhere else but also it sucks but what else do i do. i've been...
having suicidal thoughts more often. and more serious ones. no longer just
passing thoughts. i'm not okay.

also always sleepy for some reason. no matter how much sleep i get i'm always
tired and just want to lay down. i don't know if this is related or not.