hm idk if im sad or not

i think i made myself sad writing that last entry. like at the beginning i
talked about how i was relatively happy rn, and throughout the day today that's
absolutely been true. then i wrote about the loneliness/relationship stuff. and
now i'm sad again. if you asked me a couple weeks ago i would've told you i'm at
the point where i'm okay being single, at least for now. like i wouldn've said
hey it'd be neat to be in a relationship and i have no objections to it, i'm
just satisfied without it. but... idk if that's true. maybe it is, idk. i think
i'm just touch starved tbh, i want to hold someone and maybe also be held